Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
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