i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
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