I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
She bit a glass in half.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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