remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize
