this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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