I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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