I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Couch. On fire.
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