And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize