Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
