I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
