AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
