The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize