I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
