I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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