Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
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