I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
