make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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