I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
