Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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