dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Randomize
