i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize
