i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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