She went from zero to smokin in five shots
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
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