can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Randomize
