I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
There are leaves in my underwear?
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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