there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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