It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
