Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
