I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM VODKA MAN
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Randomize