We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
