why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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