I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
