her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
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I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
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You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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