it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i love accidental penises.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
