this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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