there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
