IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
