Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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