his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
