I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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