Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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