My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
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