we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Randomize
