im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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