She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
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