i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
