No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
