just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I think I sprained my soul last night
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
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