so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Randomize
