I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize